I love being a Mom

Today we received a call from JB's mom telling us his Grandma is very sick and probably won't make it much longer. She had been in poor health for awhile, but this past week she got pneumonia, and with the fibrosis in her lungs, she can't seem to fight the infection. Anyway, tonight, JB, Lewis, and I went over to visit her and basically say good-bye.
As I was driving to work later on that night, it made me start thinking about how short this life really is. I started thinking about the day when I'd become an old woman, and how all I'd have left are my memories (well, at least I hope they will have them. I am terrified of getting dementia or Alzheimer's.). I just started feeling really sad since I realized what a short amount of time I have with Lewis being a little boy. Before I became a Mom, I really dreaded the toddler stage, since all I could think of was temper tantrums and crayons on the wall. Now, all I want to do is just keep Lewis this same age for a little while longer. I absolutely LOVE being his mommy. That's not to say there aren't a lot of times when I'm happy I'm going to work and not staying at home all day with a cranky toddler, or that I don't sigh with relief when he finally goes to bed at night. However, he is such an absolute joy and a delight to be around. Tonight at the hospital he kept pointing to everyone and saying their names with a huge smile on his face. He absolutely adores his Grandma and Aunt Jessica. I love how he says Mommy. I love playing cars with him. I love taking him to places and showing him new things. And I love getting pats on the back, hugs and slobbery kisses, and him reaching up for my hand to go show me something. The best part is when he goes to bed at night, and he rests his head on my shoulder when I rock him. I am pretty sure I am going to fall apart the day he decides he doesn't want that anymore. Normally, I don't get this sentimental, but I just realized how short a time I have with him and I really want to cherish it because it will be gone all too quick.